Dienstag, 8. Februar 2011

Freelance Whales - Broken Horse



I really love this song.

Actually I heard it in 'One Tree Hill', a TV series, I started to watch again a few days ago...
I just wanted to distract myself from all the bad things which happened the last time.
In fact it doesn't work but for a short time you can pretend that everything's fine.
It's like getting into the character's heads and lose yourself and the world around you and that's what I want to achieve. The results are: less drugs, less alcohol, less wounds and at least less bad thoughts you really shouldn't think about... In the end everything's as before but you had a little off-time and sometimes you were able to refill your energy storage.

More or less unfortubately, this song reminds me of Joel (♥) He died almost a week ago but I still haven't realized it, I think. Every night I wake up either I thought my mobile made a sound, so I got a text message from him and everything was a real bad joke or I wake up drenched in sweat because I had a nightmare. I think I dreamed about at least 40 times how he died and I still can't understand what happened. I blame myself for not being chatty this day 'cause if I had been, he would still be here.

I love you and I'm really sorry I let you go. But I will follow. Won't take a long time, chéri.
Soon we will meet again ♥